Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Seriously why is the deadbolt locked. This is the second time I'm having to sleep on the porch using my boots as my pillow. I can't wait till the next time your drunk.
Shhh, I'm sleeping. Just let it happen Jess.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Holy sore nipples Batman
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
