Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
