Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
nutella sex= disaster
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
Randomize
