I think scott just propositioned me for sex
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize