pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
the cop didnt laugh with me when he patted me down and pulled out my flask.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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