My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
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