You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Serious question, on a scale of go for it to what the fuck are you thinking, what's me going to a monk or any religious official and saying "baptize me daddy" in a serious voice?
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Randomize
