I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
