So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
