My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I got inside last night via doggy door
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
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