Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
This is sufficient.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius