During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
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