If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
You have to give it to him that he fucked me out of the dull weekdays.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
It's a combination of amazing uncoordination, bad luck, and sheer determination to cause destruction wherever I go.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
