dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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