He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I answered the door to some Jehovah Witnesses hungover and wearing nothing but a white tshirt. I think they made it the church goal to reform me, we've gotten four pamphlets. My mom's going to make me convert if they keep coming.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
