Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
There is a large scratch and bruise about the size of a pizza bagel next to my vagina. Please text back if you know what happened.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
Randomize