Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
