So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
