Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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