And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
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