So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
