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• (510): View more from California

  you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.

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• (701): View more from North Dakota

  does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?

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• (954): View more from Florida

  I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.

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• (902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

  Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (914): View more from New York

  right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"

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• (631): View more from New York

  Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision

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• (614): View more from Ohio

  God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.

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• (410): View more from Maryland

  Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..

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• (509): View more from Washington

  I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.

  (248): View more from Michigan

  ..... starting now

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.

  (330): View more from Ohio

  YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR

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