I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
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