Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
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About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
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I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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