she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
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