I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
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