Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
Honestly, it was easier to just put it in my mouth than to deal with an awkward conversation.
I can't believe you just became a stipulation in their divorce papers.
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
