your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
This is one of those times I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and punch myself in the face to make me realize what I need to do before it's too late
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
