just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
She said she had a thing for dinosaurs. Come get me now
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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