Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
Randomize
