omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
