I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After the 3rd shot, she was running around singing, "Twinkle Twinkle Big Ol' Dick, on your happy place I'll sit" to your brother.
Put that bitch's torch out. She's been voted off.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize