u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
He stripped down to boxers and then started flinging jello shots with a spoon into people's mouths like a catapult.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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