If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Randomize
