I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Dicks are not precious.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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