i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
