If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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