we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She literally took off her shirt and ran out of the bar. When she ran back she smashed into the glass door with her face....That's got to be the best way to celebrate your 30th.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
is it fun? or sober?
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