So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
