uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
my mom just asked me about sexting and if I have ever sent a naked picture to anyone. i fucking hate fox news.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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