Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
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