But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
You pole danced in your parka.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
I believe in your delicious
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Randomize
