Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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