Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
He's gotta be able to drive a truck, make me mac n cheese and give me the best orgasms. That's my perfect man
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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