My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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