But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Do you think we could brew coffee with beer? I'm thinking a hazelnut Guinnesspresso can only end with pure awesome.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
Randomize
