great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
