I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
