how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
