You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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